Friends, Your Chosen Family

It is said that friends are your chosen family.  We are not talking about just any friendship, but Friendship with a capital ‘V’. In addition, love does not hurt, it does not entangle you and you feel close to another despite great distances.

De Dikke van Dale describes the word ‘friend’ as follows: ‘ Person with whom you are connected by feelings of affection. ‘ For centuries people have said that blood relationships are the most stable, unconditional and loving relationships… But what about friends?

The importance of your chosen family

Friends offer you support. Even as a child, they teach your values, role-play with you and help you become who you really are. They help develop your identity, empathy and a sense of belonging.

The concept of friendship is personal, which means that it is also a bit subjective in nature. Your expectations will change over time, depending on your experiences and your personal circumstances. As you get older, you also become more picky. You look for quality instead of quantity  and you have a much clearer picture of what a real friend is (or the type of friend you like to have around you, anyway).

Your chosen family can help  you learn and grow more about yourself. They can boost your confidence and enhance positive emotions. That is very important for your psychological balance! So we can say that friends protect you, take care of you and make you stronger.

Traits of true friends

Perhaps you have never experienced true friendship or are going through a confusing period in your life right now. Sometimes we find it difficult to distinguish acquaintances from friends, and friends from true friends — or chosen family. Below we list some characteristics of  true friendship :

• To trust. A true friend is someone you can trust; someone you can be yourself with, completely sincere and transparent. This kind of friend is there for you in good times and bad times. You also know that these people will tell you the truth, even if you don’t want to hear it.
• Reciprocity. Friendship is a shared bond where communication, actions, feelings and interests are two-way. It is normal for there to be phases where it seems more one-sided. When that happens, it’s important to empathize, learn from it, and correct your mistake (or for the other person if they fail). We all make mistakes, but chosen family forgives you and teaches you to be a better friend.

• Best wishes. Friends will be happy for you when you are doing well. They celebrate your success and are happy that you are so happy. There is no room for jealousy or selfishness. Chosen family is always there for you.
• A desire to spend time together. You want to spend time with your chosen friends, experience things together and make new memories. It doesn’t matter how much time you spend without each other or how far away you live from each other. When it comes to true friendship, this mutual feeling is always there.
• Freedom. You don’t feel stifled by true friendship. You can be yourself and there is a mutual kind of respect between you. You don’t feel used or manipulated, and you don’t demand time that you don’t have. Nor are you expected to pretend to be someone you are not. Chosen family will help you reflect, will not judge you and give you breathing room.

Chosen family is a real blessing

You can’t just find friendship with just anyone. There are plenty of people who will come and go. But sometimes, just when you least expect it, a spark is created and a special, rare bond is forged. So if you have true friendship, maintain it well . Don’t take him for granted. Be patient, sincere and considerate.

True friends will leave their mark on, on and in you forever. If you have someone like that in your life,  know that you have been extremely lucky. True friendship is magical, authentic and unconditional. You have a friend for life.