Letting Go: Accept The Past And Look Forward

Letting go is not easy. It takes courage and complete conviction that by doing this, we will free ourselves from a relationship, friendship, or situation that was holding us back. Letting go is necessary to find balance and happiness.

It takes maturity to see that it’s time to close a door. Nevertheless, it is extremely difficult to take that step from acknowledgment to actually implementing your decision. We are held back by sadness and sorrow that we will  have to overcome.

Letting go in most cases means ‘rebuilding’. It means that we have to rethink ourselves and look at who we really are. Sometimes it even means we have to start all over again.

We must also remember that some people are not yet able to accept that a certain cycle, or phase in life, has come to an end and to confront this situation in the right way.

Some people think that ending a relationship will mean their life is over for good. That after this farewell and this separation there will be nothing left. They think that letting go is part of destiny and that with that act they completely shut down their emotional life.

We should always be careful of these defeatist thoughts and attitudes. After an end, although there may be an intermediate period at first, there will eventually be a new beginning. New paths and possibilities that will lead us to the happiness we truly desire.

Today we invite you to reflect on this idea.

Core thoughts to let go in a mature and wise way

At the beginning of this article, we already indicated how important courage and conviction are in this case. To really let go, we will have to integrate many more dimensions into this process and use personal strategies worth knowing.

1. Other people are not your future; you are the creator of your own life

It is entirely possible that at times you think that a certain person has come your way because it was destiny; because this event was woven into your destiny subtly and with invisible thread.

In that love you must keep your feet on the ground, your heart attentive and your wings of personal growth spread wide. Romantic relationships are not fueled by magic, but rather by a daily sense of well-being, by compromise and by hope.

Our destiny is created in the ‘here and now’ and if you are not happy or hopeful in this present moment, then you should try to avoid being trapped in this suffering forever. Your destiny and your inner voice show you that you need to walk another path: the path of your own personal sense of well-being.

2. Letting go means making your own needs clear

Don’t be afraid to say loud and clear that you have needs too. It is not selfish to demand respect or to want to be heard and loved and that you want someone to care about you.

Sometimes, when things aren’t quite right, we choose to hold onto certain things rather than become aware of our emotional discomfort. We stick to:

• Fear: The fear that something you don’t want will happen if you do or say something. The fear of being alone, of being wrong, fear of change…
• Procrastination: We often think it’s better to “wait a little longer” because it’s possible that things will change, that a tense relationship or situation may improve, that the other person will soon realize that you’re stuck with certain things … However, time passes and none of this happens. Nothing changes.

Don’t be afraid to admit your own emptiness. Don’t be afraid to say out loud what it is you need to be happy. This has nothing to do with pride or selfishness, but rather with true courage and emotional maturity.

Needs are part of our self-esteem. They are part of our personal growth and well-being.

If you don’t see yourself as a happy and fulfilled person, don’t let your integrity be further destroyed; take action. Close this phase in your life… let it go.

3. Others are not the ones to tell you that something is over; no one has the right to close doors for you

It is often said that we will always carry in our hearts the memory of that perfect friendship that no longer exists or that love that caused us so much pain; we will always cling to those relationships that have changed us so much inside.

It is possible. However, none of the past events should indicate an end point in our daily lives.

You are not going to deny yourself new relationships because someone has disappointed you in the past. You don’t let your heart turn to ice or fall into the dark pit of despair just because someone has hurt you in the past.

Focus on the here and now. No one has your fate or the right to end a chapter in the book of your life. Letting go means creating space for new things. New and better things.

Never give up when it becomes clear that a chapter in your life needs to be closed. The key is to accept that some things just don’t work… and act on them.

Always take care of your heart;  this is the place where your true feelings live. You have to nurture these feelings with maturity, wisdom, balance… and a lot of courage.